The love of family...

While I have been one of the worst bloggers... I have also been stressing over far too many things, so sorry for the lack of all things happy and sunny!

As to not have to go into all of the stupid stressful drama that is life, I will just do a recap of the highlights from the last two months or so.

OMG... MY SUNSHINE IS A YEAR OLD!!!!!!!!!! Her birthday party was a hit! I was actually glad when it was over, nothing else to plan or organize... just day to day stuff... back to normal life. Not even a week after her birthday, my sweet girl officially gave up crawling!

Thanksgiving was wonderful. We spent it at my Aunt's house and spent the rest of the time hanging out at home... and I was spoiled with lots of one on one time with Audrey... it was the best!

About two weeks after Thanksgiving, Audrey decided that she was done with walking and wanted to run... evidently her little legs were not ready and she fell in just the right way that as she tried to catch her fall, she fractured her right arm just below her shoulder, and busted her lip a bit. Poor baby! She is so good and so happy that I didn't know that anything was truly wrong until the next day when she was not using her right arm and would cry if she was sitting or laying down because she wasn't able to push herself to a standing position. We took her to the ER and they put a splint on her arm. At first she was so smiley and laid back that I think the nurses and doctor thought I was full of it and being an overly obsessive mommy, cause boy did their demeanor change after her xrays! The following Monday we followed up an Orthopedic (who I hated, but I won't even get into that). They took off the splint the ER had put on, and then wrapped her arm to her body saying that it would heal just fine. OY! She has a check up on Monday and at this point is all healed up. Though, every time she walks too fast and/or slips and falls, our hearts stop for a second and we hold our breathe... so far so good for now...


CHRISTMAS WAS WONDERFUL SPENT IN TOLEDO, OHIO!!! I LOVE my grandparents more than I can even put into words. They are two of the absolute most important people in my life. We took Audrey out there for her second Christmas... (the first Christmas that she was actually aware of everything going on) and I'm so happy we did. My Meme and Grandpa both has smiles on their faces every time they watched my sweet sunshine... and she did the same. She did so many things while we were there that I use to do at her age in that very same house, and I felt like my heart could just explode at any moment. It wasn't even Christmas that made Christmas so wonderful, it was being surrounded by what I grew up knowing to be the safest four walls in the world! And held within those walls were most of my best memories from my childhood... and to see Audrey running around, stealing magnets off the fridge, laughing, playing with the tupperware on the floor of the kitchen, and being mesmerized by the suncatchers on the windows... it was all just too much, I didn't want to leave! I'm sad that I can't just jump in my car at any moment and see my grandparents. Maybe it's actually better this way because I would never be at my own house... I would basically only need a small one room apartment to sleep and shower in... but Toledo is not a place that I want Audrey growing up within... I wish that I could just drag my grandparents home with me instead... along with their whole condo! One of my other favorite things is how they treat my husband and how he treats them, it's like he's been part of our family all along.


My mom came home with us, planning to stay about a week and that's going well so far. I love that she has more of an opportunity to bond with her little "Angel Face" as she calls Audrey. There are no real plans for New Years and I think I like it that way. I will say that I wish I was at home right now instead of having to work this week. Joe is off work this week, Mom is in town, and Audrey is at home with them both... seems a bit unfair since I am more addicted to my sunshine than either one of them... oh and it would be nice to spend time with them too, ha ha!


Well, until I get kicked in the butt to blog again... HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Where to begin?

Well, I must admit that I've been a bad blogger the last month... such a slacker! Audrey had a great time at the zoo... and her photos came back better than I imagined. I also discovered about a week later that she had an ear infection. I'm glad that I decided to go with my gut feeling and take her to the doctor even though most everyone was saying that she was just bothered by teething effects. Well... that just wasn't so. Within two days of finishing her antibiotics and finally looking like herself again, she got a cold... another week of a congested runny little nose... and she is finally looking happy and healthy again! And only three weeks until her first birthday!

I have to admit, while I am beyond excited for her first birthday party, and my sweet girl growing up and doing more and more amazing things ever day and becoming more of a tiny person that's full of personality... I'm a little sad to see the end of her infant days.

After having a miscarriage a little over two years ago, I can hardly believe that my sunshine is really here and mine some days. Time is going by so fast, my pregnancy now seems like more of a blur of time... and giving birth was only last week... how is my sweet tiny girl already on the verge of taking her first steps??? I do my best to soak up every single moment I have with her and never take anything for granted... I just can't believe that time is going by so fast!

Her party is going to be crazy. I've never invited so many people over for anything before, I think my limit was about 10 or 12 people for drinking parties on Halloween or New Years and not everyone ever came. For my sunshine's first birthday, I have invited about 45 people over! Thankfully we are having it in our neighborhood clubhouse which can hold about 75. I'm kind of stressing over it a little actually... I've never thrown this kind of party before, for this many people... boy am I nervous. I doesn't help that I'm a complete OCD control freak when it comes to this stuff... so I'm obsessing a little more over everything than any other "normal" person would. First task... get everything needed for the party... lets see how that goes first...
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who... what... huh? Is it Friday yet?

I have been so tired lately. Today has been kind of slow at work and with only 30 minutes to go before I leap from my chair and run for the elevators... I'm falling asleep at my desk. My sweet sunshine has been having a pretty hard time with her third tooth breaking through. It's one of her top ones and it's causing her nose to run like crazy. She even had her first official fever on Sunday which made her more clingy, which I like to just call "needing extra cuddles". Two nights in a row she woke up screaming... and refused to lay back down for about two hours. She just couldn't breath through her nose from all the yuckyness and I couldn't get it all out either. Fortunately for the both of us, she was able to sleep through the night last night after I put a humidifier in her room with some vapor liquid to help with her breathing.

I hate seeing her not feeling well. Even with the pain from teething, and a major runny nose, she still seemed to be in great spirits during the day, though I could see it in her face. She just looked "off" and her eyes weren't big and bright like they normally are, they were a little more puffy and pink. I will be so happy to see her healthy and back to her normal sunshiney self soon.

This Friday, two of my closest friends and I are planning to take Audrey to the Zoo for the very first time and we are all very excited, me most of all. She loves our cat and dog so much that she smiles more for them than she does for my husband and I combined! In fact, she loves our poor cat so much she runs from Audrey now when she sees her coming! haha! I hope that she will be all better and ready for fun when Friday finally comes!

FOTO FUN FRIDAY!

She wore the above outfit for her photo shoot at Walmart last weekend... so cute!

Looking like Pebbles, and then I took the pony tail holder out and couldn't tame her hair! I had to wet it down to make it normal again, but this was just too cute/funny!

My Sunshine is in a contest!

So once again my sweet Audrey is in a contest, this time only against a handful of other gorgeous kids, all showing off lovely hair pieces by Baby K Designs (found in my likes section to the right). She is tied in second place so far, and I'm a little bummed since I can only harass people so much, haha! Voting is going to be open until Wednesday the 8th, and then the winner gets a $50 shopping spree at Baby K's etsy page. SO EXCITING!!!!! I pretty much have what I want for my sunshine all picked out :p

For anyone that is on Facebok, please go to "Baby K Designs" and "Like" the page, at the top... and then check out my SUNSHINE'S PHOTO and "like" if you think her's is the best... although you can vote for others as well as for mine. The last contest she was in she was up against hundreds and ended up in 31st place, which is exciting, but I hate that it was such a popularity contest of who had the most computers and access and so on... "A specific computer/ip address could vote once everyday... and there was a photo on there that got second place that was taken with someone's phone, horrible lighting, and not that cute. Now, I have to admit, yes I'm biased, but I'm also telling the truth since I was hoping for three other photos to get 1st if Audrey didn't because the children were so stinkin adorable. Sometimes I kick myself for entering contests because all my friends get so excited and vote for her and ask me how she's doing in the ranking and are disapointed when she doesn't win... and then I get roped into all of that as well when I'm trying to keep my thoughts at "I know she's the cutest, she doesn't have to win, it's just fun to let her be noticed." Oh goodness, the things that parenting does to us!

I'm smiling because...

Those little things that make me smile today:
(sunshine overload of smile reasons...)

• sunshine sitting in her carseat, making herself laugh while playing with her paci clip, while I observe quietly through the lovely kid mirror...
• sunshine reacting to Mommy silliness (she was yanking my hair this morning and I made a growl/snarl noise and got her fingers with my lips, she quickly pulled her arm back and held it with her other arm while shrieking and giggling)
• Awesome photo book delivered on what was a "blah" morning up to that point...

• A three day weekend approaching quickly and knowing I get to leave work 2 1/2 hours early on Friday as well!
  
• Sunshine going back to her old home daycare next week to spend the day with her bff four days per week!!!
  

• Taking sunshine for a free photo sitting at Walmart the day after she becomes 10 months old!

(the above with jeans)

• Going over the many choices of outfits to put sunshine in for said photos. Must pick one.
  
• Going to the store to pick up something I need, and finding that it's on sale!
• Comments from new (or old) followers saying they love reading my blog... and to me I'm only gushing about my sunshine on a blog because I can tell my co-workers are "over it" :p
• Anxiously awaiting the purchase of a rug I've been eyeing for our "it's just missing something" living room to make it feel more homey.
  
• Blogging about everything that makes me smile, and my sunshine taking up almost all of them!

Wordless Wednesday

daily rays of sunlight

My sweet Audrey is making me feel like my heart might explode. At the rate that it expands everyday, I thought for sure I would need a new one by now. I feel like such a little kid each time she does something so cute I hear myself making this high pitch squeal under my breathe that is probably killing my poor dogs ears. Sometimes all she has to do is look at me a certain way and I just start laughing. I wish that I could cover her body in pillows so I don't have to see that sad, pain stricken face that she gets when she has gotten hurt. You should have seen me beating up the wall for her yesterday after she fell and bonked her head on it... "BAD WALL!" Well, it's not like I can put the wall in time-out.

I'm not sure if I'm doing something wrong, or something right. I'm gone most of her entire day M-F, but when I'm around and leave the room... the world is coming to an end, and it breaks my heart. I find myself yelling from the kitchen, the bedroom, the top of the stairs... everything that I'm doing so she knows I'm still there. She doesn't react that way with anyone else. I know she's at that age, but I feel like she spends less time with me than with everyone else. I smother her with hugs and kisses for most of the time that I am with her, and I'm starting to reconsider if it's for her benefit or my own that I do that. Is that why she reacts that way since no one else smothers her with love in such a way... maybe I'm keeping her from being independent from me. Maybe I'm just over-thinking all of this... it wouldn't be the first time. :p

A new outlet

I've created a new blog (listed on my about me page) that is all about my struggles and triumphs to get my pre pre pre baby figure back. So far it has forced me to be accountable for my actions and choices. My first triumph has been the beginning of the end my of pop consumption. My last can of carbonated icy goodness was on the 16th of this month. I feel like I can be proud of that if nothing else at the moment because I can't seem to force myself to exert any kind of energy to burn off all the cans of pop I've had up until that point. But either way, I feel as though this is the beginning, something that I feel could actually make a difference... We'll see I guess.

In other news... my 9 1/2 month old sunshine is growing like a weed... well, more like a really pretty, fast growing flower. She is in the 90-95% for her weight, height and head circumference! She is also so much fun!!! She is having quite a time with all of her new finger foods. She had spaghettios for the first time two nights ago and I could not have imagined what fun we were both in for five minutes before I plopped the bowl in front of her.









Some of the best times I've had were when I've laughed to the point of tears. My sunshiney pregnancy was full of those moments which makes me believe have something to do with my little ones sunshiney disposition. She is quite babbley and loves to tell me all about things. She crawls to me when I pick her up at the end of the day (my favorite time of day). Yesterday she crawled to me, and then held onto my pants to pull herself up to a stand... and stayed there for a good few minutes staring up at me with such a proud look on her face. She was investigating my teeth a few nights ago and I thought for sure I was going to pee in my pants. I was talking to her and she started to touch my teeth with her finger... THEN SHE STUCK HER WHOLE HAND IN MY MOUTH TRYING TO GRAB MY TEETH! She grinned and did it a few more times until tears were falling down my face.

Three more hours to go and I will be making my sunshine giggle in my arms!

Wordless Wednesday

Ok... maybe just a few words... This was taken with my phone during my drive to work this morning... unedited.

YUM!

I am always making some kind of dish that I'm either craving or something different for dinner because I'm tired of the same old stuff, or we get invited somewhere...etc. Whenever this happens I like to share with other the things I've tried or how I spent my time cooking... did it turn out well..etc. So... in the style of an artistic friend, I decided to use my camera for something other than following my daughter around to document her every breath.

We were invited to a friend's house for dinner on Sunday and he is use to my "home made" meals... so he requested some kind of pasta dish "Jennifer Style". So, I decided to make this delicious cold Italian pasta dish that I found and made for a work party we had for the Olympics. It was a real hit at the office, so I figured he would like it as well.

The next treat that I was craving was SUN TEA!!! My step mom's sister was making it the other day when I had gone to pick up Audrey. She also gave me a wonderful tip when making sun tea... mix a cup of water with a cup of suger and stick it in the microwave to make simple syrup and poor it into the tea... PERFECT! There wasn't as much sun as I really needed probably, so it's not as strong as I would like, but it's close enough until my next attempt. (It was blue skys when I first put the bottle outside.)

Finally, I had found this great recipe for oatmeal cookies a few weeks ago. I had been looking for one since I am still nursing my daughter and "they" say that real oatmeal helps with a mother's "supply"... and I'll do just about anything for Audrey... make homemade oatmeal cookies... ugh, if I must, haha! I didn't flatten the dough balls with a sugared fork, and I used dried cranberries instead of raisins, and they turn out so very good. They have a great amount of vanilla and cinnamon, and they are soft and chewy. This second batch didn't turn out as well as my first... shockingly I think it's because the first time I didn't follow the directions and I only left the batter in the fridge for "maybe" an hour when it said AT LEAST an hour. Since we were leaving to go to our friend's for dinner, I decided to make the cookies after we got home... I have the other half of the dough left and will be leaving the batter on the counter for at least an hour before I make cookies out of the rest of it,... we will see if that helps.

To Diet or Not to Diet... that is the question... of the moment

I had my daughter Audrey almost nine months ago now. I wasn't in the best shape when I got pregnant with her in the first place... and then I gained 50lbs while pregnant. I lost about 30lbs of that weight, but since then... nothing more. I look at my current eating habits and I know it needs work... and so... how much "work" am I able to endure? I must fess up to my horrible habits:

• pop
• pasta
• cookies
• chocolate
• ice cream
• pastries (on occasion)
• whole milk latte's
  

... I basically don't limit myself at all right now which is the main problem. I don't really know how though... I either eat it, or I don't. I will be coming back to this after I put in some thought... a game plan is what I need...

An addition to "things that make me smile"

THIS FACE!!! It's her "I don't think I like that food" face. I LOVE IT!!!

A Lovely Idea...

Since I often enjoy copying truly great ideas... I am going to follow in the footsteps of a friend I've known for an amount of time that I would rather not say simply because it is starting to show my age... oh jeeze...

Writing about the things I love and make me happy... or as I like to put it... the simple things that make me smile...

• Getting inspiration from a far away friend and feeling like they're never really too far away.
• Starbucks Iced Vanilla Latte' on a Friday morning... even better on Saturdays, but it makes the Friday work day seem enjoyable if that's possible.

• Having a giggly pregnancy and giving birth to the most smiley child I've ever known in my whole life.

• Pushing myself to work out and having the feeling of accomplishment after I've met my daily goal.
• Flowers.
• Getting a hug from my favorite hugger... my Meme. Although, Audrey is slowly becoming my top hugger... oooh, just thought of a group hug between me, my Meme, and Audrey... it made me giggle!

• Sitting outside in the sun during a summer morning and listening to the birds singing.
• Being able to sleep with the window open and feeling the fresh breeze on my face.
• The original classic Christmas songs sung by Judy Garland, Nat King Cole, Bing Crosby, Frank Sinatra... etc.

• Flower coated trees in the Spring, and red and orange speckled trees in the Fall.

• The way fresh fallen snow makes everything sparkle at night under street lights. It's like everything becomes magical.

• Friends that think I'm awesome, even on my worst days.
• Cooking a meal for friends and family and watching them truly enjoying it.
• Family.
  
• Watching Disney Movies and singing along to all the songs.
• Drivers that wave "thank you" when you let them merge in front of you.
• Saturday morning.
  
• Finding new things that make me smile...

Those good ol' kid days... OUCH!!!

So, I was discussing with some co-workers this morning the dangers of having a little boy vs. a little girl... and realized as I was about to say this that gender DOES NOT MATTER! My mom got hurt many times while growing up due to tiny bones... which became many broken bones through the years. My hubby hurt himself a lot growing up as well, usually in ways that I would fear... finger stuck in a locked car door, hand/arm put through a glass door, leg broken as a small child and being put in almost a whole body cast...etc. During these thoughts I began to play back my childhood falls, scrapes, bruises... and realized I had some super OUCH! moments of my own.

Leaving me Speechless
I don't remember much of this one, but my mom remembers walking upstairs with me, hand in hand, as I was being potty trained with only one, second story, bathroom. One of us lost our footing and we went tumbling backwards. Somehow I got my teeth jammed into my lip and had to go to the emergency room. I do remember sitting on a table in the hospital... and that is about the extent of that memory. Everything turned out ok, teeth still in my mouth and straight, still had my lip attached to my face, thumbs up.

Hello Puppy
This one was more of a long term psychological injury than it was physical. I was eleven and visiting my grandparents for the summer as I always did. I had always been an animal person... LOVED THEM ALL!!! I was over at my best friend's house during a visit from her Aunt and pup. The dog must have been over stimulated by all the people and weather and overall change in it's daily life because I remember being kind of nervous of it from the beginning. It didn't help that he tried to take a chunk out of my friend's super awesome dog Dasher who wouldn't hurt a fly. As we walked her Aunt and pup out to their car at the end of her visit, the dog was in the line up of good byes and I'm not sure he knew his manners cause as I reached out my arm to pet him, he jumped up on me. He got my wrist in his mouth and bit down, got me with one paw scratching the top of my lip, and sucker punched me with the other paw across my forehead. In the end the physical damage wasn't too bad, I was so scared of getting stitches that the doctor decided I could get away without them (although I don't think that was wise of the lazy doctor to do since I have an eye shaped scar still on my wrist), but boy was I terrified of almost all dogs for years after that. I remember crying in a grocery store one time because an animal rescue group had brought in some retired gray hound racing dogs for everyone to see and they were blocking the my exit!

Teeter Totter Mishap
Never trust someone that is bigger than you on the other end of a teeter totter! I'm not sure how old I was, probably about nine or ten maybe? I was playing on a teeter totter, which I must say isn't a very safe playground invention, and someone who WAS NOT a friend was sitting on the other end. There were tires in the ground under each seat so the seat didn't hit the ground when it came down, but my teeter partner realized that if she lifted her legs when coming down, the seat would bounce a little, which then bounced me on the other end... in the air! I kept pleading with her to let me off or to stop bouncing me cause I was going to fall off, she was bouncing me pretty high at that point and I thought I was going to fly forward off the seat, but she didn't stop. I at one point started to fall off... sideways, and as I was starting to slide off the side, she kept "bouncing" which made me jerk a bit and slide harder... by the time I got off the teeter totter I was in tears. I jumped onto my bike trying desperately trying to balance myself on the bike seat using my tailbone while keeping my feet and other "parts" in the air. I got to my baby sitters house and... well... how do you explain a damaged "hooha" when you are that age? They gave me some pop and sat with me until my mom picked me up. The worst part of that injury was our trip to Ohio, on a plane, THAT NIGHT! I didn't want to eat or drink anything our whole trip for fear of having to use the bathroom... and spent the whole visit in bed watching movies with pillows between my legs! That is one experience that is still all too clear for me... OW!!!!

Watch Out For That Tree!
Sixth Grade... It was called Outdoor Ed... in the dead of winter... great idea guys!!! Three days and two nights were spent at an outdoor lodge type place. For the most part it was pretty fun. There were a good amount of things to do, but my fun only lasted half the trip. One of the activities, of course, was sledding! They had this awesome inner-tube with fabric over the center so you, or two, could lay in the center of it and literally glide down the snowy hill as fast as possible. Well, me and my two friends didn't want to separate, so we decided that our friend Beth could lay over me and Lauren since we were the same size and height, and Beth was super tiny and short. We were soooo excited. Who knew that with more weight... you go faster... We sped down that hill and used the stopping barricade as a ramp and kept on going. I saw that we were headed straight for a tree and I tried to duck my head to the side as to avoid hitting the tree head on... literally. We did hit the tree, and I smacked my head right behind my left ear. Beth was hurt the most initially, and Lauren and I helped her walk back up the hill. Later though, I was not doing well. We had to hike back and forth over this hill through the woods to get to the cafeteria for meals, and by dinner time I couldn't see in the dark and my head was killing me. Everyone was getting annoyed that I was holding onto them so tightly trying to get them to help me along the way. I ate a little at dinner... and then line dancing lessons were held after that which I laid on the floor in a ball during. Eventually one of the teachers had me get up and they called my mom. I begged her, sobbing, to come get me... lol... two hour drive in the middle of the night... didn't happen despite my mild concussion. I was given some pop and headache pills and then driven over to another building where all the groups were doing their "last night skits". Beth was pretty upset with me because we were supposed to fall down dead together in ours, and she had to fall to her death all alone... as I sat at a table falling asleep on my arm... being jerked awake every five minutes by a teacher or parent. The next day was the day we got to go home... YAY... but not before a huge game of capture the flag under clear sunny skies... which gave the snow a lovely glowy effect... awesome situation when you feel like your head is splitting in the middle.

Those are the major ones that I can remember right now... but I would just like to ask, what is it with adults giving kids pop when they get hurt??? Hmmm...

Wow, I guess I'm a Mommy

I can't believe it's already almost the end of my workday on Tuesday. I was driving to pick up Audrey yesterday and as I was driving I was trying to figure out where the day went. Don't get me wrong, I was by no means complaining, my day just felt like a complete blur. The weekend kind of felt like that as well as I was getting Audrey ready for bed on Sunday night. If I had not done so much on Saturday, and then on Sunday as well, I would have thought someone had drugged me and stolen a day!I don't remember what I did on Friday after I got home from work. I do remember feeling like I couldn't believe it was already Friday though. Saturday I cleaned and cooked and cleaned and cooked some more. I made Chicken Stroganoff, made Audrey some baby food, and prepped some food to make beef stew on Sunday since I was going to a baby shower and wouldn't have time or energy to come home and cook after that. For Audrey I had cooked up some sweet potatoes and some squash and zucchini and blended each of those up, poured them into ice cube trays and stuck them in the freezer. Blueberries were next, followed by a small pot of green beans. I hope to make a bit more this weekend as she is almost out of carrots, nectarines and plums, and blueberries. She's going to be eating more meet I hope... I just can't seem to get that on the menu for her... there are not enough brain cells at the end of the day to figure out that I need to make chicken for her a day before I can actually feed it to her since I have to give her dinner shortly after we get home. So, for now, it's veggies and cereal still.

These days I find that I get home, get done what I think needs to get done, and then realize there is something else to be done... and then another thing is on my list. I watch roughly an hour of tv during the course of three hours that I'm doing different things and attempting to sit and relax. If Audrey tells me to jump, I ask how high! Yesterday I was playing with her, taking her little arms and acting like she was slapping me, punching me in the nose and chin, and each time knocking me out. Talk about some crazy laughter! My mom told me to watch out because she may realize that she likes it a little too much, I told her that if that amount of squeals and giggles means a fat lip... than I welcome a fat lip! Yup, I'm a Mommy.

Audrey Sway

My whole world revolves around this tiny, little person now. She is absolutely everything to me. I think about her almost every single moment of every single day. Who would have known that all these years while I was dreaming of the perfect baby girl, I wasn't even coming close to the absolute perfection she turned out to be?!?! She is so happy all the time. She delights a room full of people, she has fans in many states, adoptive family that have taken her in as their own blood, I couldn't wish for more love surrounding her, it's impossible. I call her my sunshine because she is the light shining so bright in every direction all around me. She makes me feel warm with the smallest of smiles. I can only hope that I am the best Mommy that she could ever wish for!!!

Wordless Wednesday!

A great site!!!

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